Episode 793: Living for Love“We don't know how to do this,” Tansy complained. “We should go to a bakery.”
“I did think about that,” her mom admitted. “Your grandma has a sixth-sense for baked goods though, she'd figure it out and that would make me even more of a black sheep than I already am in her house, so, we're going to do this ourselves.”
“It won't be perfect,” Tansy warned. She knew how much perfection mattered to her mom, especially in the eyes of her grandmother. This was just going to stress her out, and Tansy didn't really want to be a part of that. She had enough of her own stuff going on, she couldn't deal with her mom spiraling, too.
“Your dad and brother are on strict orders to steer clear of the kitchen tonight so we can concentrate. Your grandmother gave us really detailed recipes, we'll do our best to follow them and that will have to be good enough.”
“Is that for real? Just doing our best will be enough? That doesn't sound like you. You're not going to freak if the edges are a little burnt or the criss-cross bits on the top are crooked?”
Her mom did in fact freak out about those things, but they were able to laugh it off, their distasters were just so disastrous that you had to laugh. And the laughing, it was really nice, because Tansy could hardly even remember her mom laughing before, and for the last year or so, Tansy had hardly laughed either.
It was one of the most fun times she'd had in awhile, and maybe the most fun she'd ever had with her mom, the most at ease she'd ever been around Mom's shifting moods.
“Maybe grandma was right about us baking these together,” Tansy said as they peered into the oven window at their latest attempt. “I mean, I'm not sure we'll actually have any edible ones to bring with us tomorrow, but it hasn't been bad.” She hadn't just been afraid of her mom flipping out, she'd been afraid of the bonding thing, afraid she'd be forced to talk, instead, it had taken her mind off all the worrying and the wondering, for a few hours she'd actually felt like a happy-go-lucky kid, which was like, the best early Christmas gift imaginable.